I look around sometimes, and it seems like many of us are walking around searching for validation, searching for someone to tell us that we are, indeed, good enough.
We walk around with our eyes looking outward, asking the world to tell us what we are worth as if it is something out there to be found.
And the world is there with an answer. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we stand for, someone will be there to tell us we’re not worth it. Whether we are woman or man, black or white, locally born, foreign born, or somewhere in between, someone will hate us. People will pick us apart and judge us based upon the worst. They won’t look inside.
In this world, we don’t need to look far to find the hate. Directed at us. Sometimes because of us and sometimes just because of what we might represent in the mind of another.
Constantly looking outward will never bring us feelings of worth. And we can’t give up that power to determine our worth. To anyone. For any reason. At any time.
We must answer our own question, determine our own dignity and worth and value in this world.
It’s easy to get lost in the world and start believing all of the negative messages and hate. But then I look at my little girls, and I question where their worth comes from. And the answer is as clear as day. It doesn’t come from me or from others. It doesn’t even come from their own volition. It’s inherent. They were born with it, created with it, and created for it. Their worth isn’t determined by their actions or thoughts or feelings. It’s not determined by the best they have or the worst nor is it determined by how much they give to others or how much they can accumulate for themselves.
It reminds me that there most definitely is a God and most definitely is an afterlife because that deep value and meaning and purpose was created with love long before any of us were a speck on the fabric of life.
We have worth because we are and because we were created and because we are loved.
Through the pain this world has to offer — rejection, unanswered prayers, unrealized dreams, and deep pervasive loneliness — we lose our sense of worth, and we are left with a human race searching for answers in places where they cannot be found. We need to look inward and then look upward, and then perhaps we can stop searching for that which cannot be found here.
Perhaps then we can find our answer. That yes, indeed, we are good enough. And no one else can take that away. Not even ourselves. And most certainly not others.
My guess is that the pain of rejection, failure, and fear are born of this very tendency to look outward. And that our buffer against these pains isn’t in avoiding them but in putting them in their place. In recognizing them as disappointments and setbacks but knowing that they can never touch who we are. Because that is untouchable.