Quitting Facebook??

I never thought I would quit Facebook.  Often, I would see people post, with moral indignation and superiority, that they were going to break up with Facebook.  They would say how annoyed they were with people who posted kid pictures, work updates, political opinions, quotes, etc etc.  I would read those posts and chuckle.  After all, where does someone get up the courage to judge what another centers their life around?  Surely the problem was within the individuals leaving.

But now I’m considering leaving.  What does that say about me?

I really enjoy catching up with some people on Facebook.  It is nice to see what old classmates are up to, and it’s interesting how closely my life parallels that of people I had never previously thought I had much in common with.  I love seeing people’s baby pictures.  And I like hearing people’s political opinions.  Usually when people post them, they welcome other opinions and good dialogue can get started.  (Usually, not always.)  And I even like it when people put up quotes.  I’m a quote hog, and if someone routinely posts good quotes, I’m happy; if they usually post quotes embedded in pictures of kitty cats hugging baby chicks, then I’ve probably already unfriended them, and it’s of no significance to me.

And so why am I so frustrated by Facebook?

I think part of the answer is self selection.  In the real world, we choose who we allow into our lives.  If I am going to pack the girls into the car and drive somewhere to meet someone, it’s going to be someone who I want to see and who adds something to my life.  I don’t talk on the phone much, but if I do, it’s going to be to someone who I can have quality conversations with.  And even with email, if I take the time to compose my thoughts, I am going to care about the person I’m sending it to and I’m going to want to hear their responses.

But Facebook is much less selective.  Every time you log on, it’s like going to a large party and having to hear what everyone has to say whether you really like them or not.  Simply having had known someone in the past all of a sudden makes them worthy of a Facebook friend request.

And perhaps that’s why I get so annoyed with it.  Maybe I’m just not a really nice person who likes a large pool of people.  But I’m just not sure any of us were really meant to function in that way.  Human beings are social, communal animals, but we also have strong preferences and are prone to strong ties with relatively few people.  Facebook gives us superficial relationships with a vast number of people we really don’t even know.

And so, I have considered quitting Facebook, but to quit Facebook in this day seems almost like dropping off the radar.  And there are honestly some people who I have gotten in touch with after many years who I really enjoy reading about.  Some people were close friends at one point, and other people were barely acquaintances, but still I feel that at this point, I am benefiting from a Facebook relationship with them, superficial or not.

And perhaps it all comes down to the type of communication out there.  I’ve come to a point in my life where I simply do not want negativity in here.  There has been enough negativity and judgment out there for way too long, and I simply don’t have the time or the energy or really the desire to deal with it.  So if people make posts about goals they have or their families or fun trips or ideas that make me think, then I benefit.  But when people post just as a way of self promotion and as an ego boost, then I am none to slow to hit the “unfriend” button.  I’ve unfriended multiple people in the last few days, and with each click of the button, I feel a wave of relief that another source of negative affect has been purged from my life.

I never wanted to be the type of person who would go on at length about quitting Facebook.  I’m not pretentious or particularly hard to get along with.  I generally like people and am open to new ideas.  I’m fairly open hearted.

But some days it just makes me want to pull my hair out.

What about you?  Have you ever considered quitting Facebook or other social media?