A Mama’s Questions

To my girls…

It’s a weird thing that happens when you watch someone taking their last breaths just days before you watch another someone taking their first.  You start to see life as a progression more so than perhaps you normally do.  You see the promise of a new life juxtaposed against the fulfillment of another.  You start to see the miracle in every day and start to realize that your own story is being written with each breath taken.

And it’s through those eyes that I’ve been viewing you lately.

I ask myself… who will you be?  What will your challenges be?  What strengths are you going to bring to your days?  What are the demons you will battle?  How will they change you and mold you?  In what will you place your trust, your faith, your love?

Will you climb mountains?

Will you tame animals?

Will you be wild and free or reserved, keeping your secrets to yourself?

Will you write books or sing songs or fight fires or teach children?

Each day I relish watching the answers unfolding before my eyes.

It’s a blessing to look at our own lives each day as a page to be written.  But with you three, the questions are bigger because your slate has yet to be written on.

I pray daily that I can be the example and model that you need even as I recognize that it’s a job none of us are qualified for.

Many, many decades from now you will be facing your own final day, and Lord willing, I will be on the other side awaiting you.  I pray that yours is a life of happiness and joy and fulfillment.  I pray your dreams will come true, and I pray that the dreams that don’t come true will only serve to strengthen and fortify you.  I pray you find something bigger than yourself to live for and to have faith in.  I pray that you know love and know how to love, and I pray that the example I give you is what will set you up for a lifetime of faith in love and open, albeit cautious, trust of those all around you.  I pray you see the beauty in this world and know that you are an integral part of that beauty.  I pray you know peace.

The pages have yet to be written and life and its lessons have yet to really imprint themselves on your hearts.  I don’t know who you will become, but I am so blessed to have a front row seat to the journey.

So go forth and embrace life.  Live it fully.  Immerse yourself.  Love big.  Become who the Lord has created you to become.  This life is your birth right.  I pray you make the very most of it.

I am so proud to be your mommy.